After Man Came Woman….

Red sky at night – shepherd’s house on fire.

Happiness is chatting up a girl for ten minutes and then finding out she’s fancied you for twenty.

I need to lose a few pounds –
If I look at you long enough it will kill my appetite.

To the greedy, the selfish, the wicked and the evil people in the world –
I suggest that you take up space travel.
Offer yourself to the Americans next time they’re planning a one-way trip to Mars.

If you fail the intelligence test to become a road sweeper, you can always apply to be a traffic warden.

After man came woman –
And she’s been after him ever since.

Mistletoe – a parasitic, poisonous evergreen plant, which I’d rather eat than kiss you.